Friday, April 20, 2007

Advice for my son...

I'm constantly trying to infuse my son with what he calls "life lessons."

At certain points in our conversations, he'll look up at me and ask: "Dad, is this a life lesson?"

My usual response is "Yes."

Two reasons: One, because he's pretty bright and quickly catches on when I'm trying to tell him something I think is important and two, because I want him to remember certain things.

It occurred to me on a recent TDY that I should try to organize these thoughts and write them down...3 handwritten pages later...here is the first point in this process.

Small note here...My 10 year-old already knows Rule #1. I've drilled it into his brain for the last 3 years, and if you ever ask him what Rule #1 is, he is very quick to respond appropriately.

So begins "Advice to my son..."

RULE # 1

TAKE CARE OF YOUR WOMEN.

Plain and simple, it is a man's responsibility to take care of his women. If you are a son, take care of mom and sisters. If you are a husband, take care of your wife. If you are a father, take care of your daughters. Later in life, take care of your mom again.

But what does that mean? Well if you ask me (and he does!), it means your women come FIRST.

Let’s start with mom…

I’ve tried to instill in my son a sense of responsibility. You don’t want mom worrying about you. You want mom to be proud of you!

How do you make these things happen?

Be the model kid.
- Behave. Probably the best way to make mom proud.
- Get good grades. Mom won’t worry about you in school.
- Do your homework. She shouldn’t have to keep up with your school work.
- Pick up after yourself. She cleans the entire house, why would you add to her burden?
- Do what she tells you, when she tells you. This is a respect thing, and isn’t that what this is all about?
- Take care of yourself physically. Moms worry about these things. So brush your teeth, take good showers, eat right, play outside a lot and keep yourself in shape!

The ultimate goal is going to be a recurring one: Be that guy.

That guy is the kid other moms wish they had. Later in life this turns into that guy girls wish they had, that guy is the husband women wish they had, etc. That guy is also the one other guys look to as an example.

You want to be that guy. He’s the one that makes his mom proud. It all starts when you’re a kid.

I’m a very lucky man. My son IS that guy! At this point in his life he’s doing many of the things I talk about above, and it is hard to imagine being any prouder of him.

But complacency is a terrible trap, always right around the corner. So we talk. We revisit these lessons periodically, and I try to let him know certain things…

As good-looking, smart, charming, nice, hard-working, talented, and gifted as you may be, there is always…ALWAYS, someone out there better looking, smarter, more charming, nicer, harder-working, more talented and more gifted than you are! You may not meet them everyday, you may never meet them, they may sit next to you, but they are there. Don’t ever forget that!

Enough for now…

That was the first third of those three handwritten pages…much more to follow!

6 comments:

Buck said...

Well said. Sean is indeed that guy!

At the risk of seeming just a wee bit biased (moi? vraiment?), so are you and your brother Sam.

Becky G said...

Excellent post. Your mom must really be proud of you. I already know your dad is.

Anonymous said...

I'm not so sure I'm "That guy", but after reading this post... I have a good path to getting there.

I echo Dad's comment, well said.

Laurie said...

Damn, how come I never met anybody remotely like "that guy"?

Bag Blog said...

I found "that guy" and now I want one for my daughter, but they seem to be few and far between.

Great post.

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